Can we detach ourselves from grief of a lost one?

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detach from personal loss

When you suffer the loss of a near and dear one it’s an extremely painful experience because of those emotional bonds that held you together. And all of a sudden those bonds have got snapped, so at that time the experience of grief is very natural.

You should expect to go through that feeling of grief unless you have reached that level of detachment, which is very few. So, there’ll be certain natural experiences and sequence of events alike;

What’s Below is What We All Go Through

First of all, you may be affected by disbelief. The mind refuses to believe that this person is actually gone. So, there will be a period of denial of disbelief, no that person is actually there. They can’t leave us like this and go. All these jumbles your life.

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A sense of guilt sometimes comes, which would compel you to think, is there something that I did not do that I could have done? Or was it in my ability to save this person but I did not exert myself? These feelings of guilt also come and then torments your state of mind.

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You are overcome by anger, anger upon yourself, anger upon god, anger upon the person who left and then comes the period of grief, so that period of grief may be a few days for someone, a few weeks for somebody else, a few months for someone else.

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All this is natural when you suffer the loss of a near and dear one. You must expect these things to happen. But then, going through it you have to recover, recollect yourself and decide to move on with your life. For your sake and for the sake of the person who has left now. Our Vedic scriptures say that nobody actually dies.

The Continuity of Pain

The person has gone by his or her own karmas and would it give pleasure to that person to see that we are grieving and making our own existence painful? Rather the person would be more pleased to see that we have recovered from the grief. We have now taken charge and are utilizing our life in a meaningful and beneficial manner. So, decide that your human form is too precious to waste in grief and as soon as possible overcome the grief.

In our Hindu traditions, there is a period of grieving which is 12 days, or theory the 13th day. Until the 13th-day people suspend all activities and they sit in grief so that much time is allowed. But after that, if the grieving continues that is not acceptable as per Vedic scriptures.

In other words, if you are still grieving after that then decide this is your own weakness. It’s your own attachment and it will not please the almighty and the departed soul. If you keep the grief, you must overcome this. So bring knowledge to yourself, everybody had to go one day. Remember, when the sun sets we don’t grieve for it. We know that it rose and it will set, something that was bound to happen.

Why should we feel so bad about it? One day we will go ourselves, utilize that opportunity to develop a spirit of detachment and renunciation that truly everything is temporary in this world and all these relationships will bitter away one day.

Dedicated to Someone Close

Having said all of this, we dedicate this post to a sweet soul which left us exactly an year ago. People around the person still cry their heart out, their souls ache in pain. We pray for them to overcome this loss and pass on this message to each one of you to have the at most strength in these tough time! Stay Strong❤