Creating a guest list for a wedding is inevitably a stressful part of planning.
Those whom you may be distanced from at this point in time could still be upset when they don’t receive an invitation. A family member whom you haven’t spoken to in a long time may be shocked when an invitation never arrives.
Every person a couple adds to their wedding guest list is another cost endured.
When you are putting together the guest list for your wedding, don’t forget about plus-ones. A plus-one is an additional person, typically a date, that an invited guest is able to bring to your wedding.
Traditionally, people who are part of the wedding party, immediate family members and guests who may not know a lot of other attendees get plus-ones.
However, giving all these people plus-ones may be outside your budget, or may not be deemed necessary. For example, many couples don’t want to have a bunch of additional people they aren’t familiar with at their wedding, which can happen when too many plus-ones are handed out.
When it comes to wedding plus-ones, there are lots of different approaches a bride and groom can take. (iStock)
There are a lot of different approaches couples take when it comes to wedding plus-ones. No matter what approach you use, be prepared for invited guests to still reach out to you and ask if they can bring someone.
1. Reserved for the wedding party
Often, a bride and groom will allow those in their wedding party to bring a guest to the wedding.
This is a good baseline to work from, as allowing your wedding party to bring a guest can be seen as a token of the couple’s gratitude for your involvement in their big day.
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If you are on a tighter budget and/or want to have a small wedding, reserving plus-ones for the wedding party can be a simple, clear-cut way to do it.
2. ‘No ring, no bring’
An approach that couples have used when it comes to plus-ones is going by the “no ring, no bring” policy.”
As the name implies, if invited guests aren’t already married or engaged (has a ring), they don’t get a plus-one.
Some couples who want to have a more intimate wedding follow the “no ring, no bring” policy, meaning only those who are married or engaged get to bring a significant other. Beware that this policy may upset guests who are in serious relationships but are not married. (iStock)
This policy is typically used when a couple doesn’t want a huge wedding and wants their big day to be an event filled with people who are close to them.
This approach, however, can get a little bit complicated, as it leaves out couples who have been dating for a long time.
It’s up to the couple how strongly they want to stick to this policy.
3. The implied plus-one
This approach is a bit of a lighter take on “no ring, no bring.”
A lot of times, guests will get a plus-one, but it’s implied who they will be bringing.
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For example, if you have a friend who is in a serious relationship with a partner, you may give that person a plus-one under the assumption the long-term partner is the one they’ll be bringing.
Again, be very clear about this on your invitation. For example, if you don’t write the boyfriend or girlfriend’s name on the invitation, and you choose to write “and guest” instead, that implies that the invited guest can choose whomever they want to bring to the wedding.
As the bride and groom, be very careful about how you address your invitations. Make it very clear who exactly is invited to your event to avoid any confusion. (iStock)
Though you gave them the plus-one with the thought they would invite their significant other, in the case that they break up before your wedding, or the significant other simply can’t attend, they could still use their plus-one for someone else.
If you don’t want a person you don’t know attending your wedding, this could be a problem.
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This is why it’s so important to be clear about who exactly you want attending the wedding. If you are OK with them bringing whomever they choose, simply giving them a plus-one is fine, but if they are in a long-term, committed relationship, writing both names on the invitation will provide clarity for everyone.
4. An open invitation
For those who are having a very large event with a big budget, couples tend to be more open with their invitation policy.
In these cases, couples may give out plus-ones to lots of guests, allowing them to bring whomever they’d like to the wedding.
For those who want to have larger weddings and have room and their budget to do so, there will be a lot of invited guests who are able to bring a plus-one. (iStock)
If you receive a plus-one for a wedding, this traditionally means you can bring a date. In some instances, the couple is OK with you bringing a friend.
This could happen in the case that a person was given a plus-one as they are a friend or family member that won’t know a lot of the guests at the wedding.
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Many couples will choose to give someone in this scenario a plus-one. If the person is single, he or sh may decide to bring a friend whom they can spend time with throughout the wedding.
If you are given a plus-one, but don’t have a date to bring and would like to bring a friend, just ensure that the couple knows who you will be bringing and ensure that it’s fine with them.